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zuvembi

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Abuse of code reformatting [May. 16th, 2011|01:36 pm]
zuvembi
Subject: Lovecraftian horrors: reformatting code
Importance: High

Please don’t reformat code at your whim in some of the larger files. <example_file.java> in <crappy_application> being the file that has caused me to lose SAN points today. It makes it so so so so so so much harder to figure out what has changed.

It’s a 3500 line file that has something like a dozen large changes from each branch. I don’t even know *who* didn’t. Just don’t. Please.



From: Dev Lead
To: Offends + me
Subject: RE: Lovecraftian horrors: reformatting code

I think the solution is to get <crappy_application> down to just one filter class of 250,000 lines of code.



Subject: RE: Lovecraftian horrors: reformatting code
To: All + Dev Lead
Subject: Shub-niggurath and the it's thousand unholy young

I like the solution of auto-formatting your code as part of the commit process. I’m sure that would be popular.

No. Better. I’ll just randomly fail with mysterious error messages on commit until your code formatting is perfect.
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Spite Driven programming [May. 9th, 2011|10:59 am]
zuvembi
Inspired by JWZ's Hatefuck hacking article, I wrote this blurb up.




I've generated a lot of software out of spite in the last year or two.

Continuous Integration Server – "No, fuck you! You broke the build!"

Staging repository / web-app – "Jesus christ! That shell script only has two parameters. How do you put your pants on in the morning?"

pre-commit checks – "Fuck me. You can't even do svn switch right, what is your major malfuction? And I fucking dare you to put 'initial import' again (for the 72nd time)."

Source control quick search webapp – "God damn it! If you tell me it's a merge problem one more time without at least looking at the code change first, I'm going to go over there and defenestrate you."

Continuous Review software – "You didn't review any of that code you lying scrote weasel. Time for five minutes with a live octopus down the pants!"

Database munging to actually make our bug database work in a browser – "I fucking hate you so so so much Kwality Center. I hope someone got primo lap dances and scotch to buy this piece of shit."
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Well, that's just odd. [Feb. 25th, 2009|05:25 pm]
zuvembi
People will flag anything on CL for removal, won't they?

Post a little tongue-in-cheek ad for something and people get their knickers in a twist.




Title: (free stuff) Free starter Virgin Mary

While doing some yard work, I was examining my statue of the Blessed Virgin Mary and came to a conclusion. This conclusion my friends was that she was far too small for my current level of piety. After a certain amount of spade-work and some ungentlemanly grunting (which I assure you did not tarnish her... virgin ears), I was able to remove her from her resting place betwixt the roses.

I thought perhaps to break her up into pieces, since surely I would not be able to move her to a new resting place or dispose of her myself. My lovely (and talented) assistant however insisted I leave her Virgo Intacti and offer her to someone else in the world so that they might be blessed with her manifestation in their yard as they begin their own personal path to sainthood.

So here she is, my starter Virgin Mary ready for someone to come claim her:











Terms:

1. No, I will absolutely not drop it off. For one thing, I don't even own a car, and I'm not bikin>

2. I won't help you lift it. Bring a few strong backs, a jack, a crane or some other means of shift>

3. No weirdos or religious crazies please.
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Geek Angst [Feb. 16th, 2009|01:52 pm]
zuvembi
[mood |disgusted]

If Ubuntu is so insanely great, why do I always end up wanting to develop a time machine to go back in time and kill all the project leads grandparents in grisly fashions?

Backstory: I was trying to install it (8.10) on a little MSI Wind nettop box. I got it installed and it ended up stuttering horribly on video. I realized once again that Ubuntu does heinous amounts of handholding for Xorg configuration, which is great if everything works perfectly, and if it doesn't it drops on the floor. If I wanted to manually edit the xorg.conf from scratch I'd install fucking Slackware. No, I lie, Slackware at least had a configuration script last time I used it. sax2 (from SuSE) is so far superior in every imaginable way I have trouble comprehending what the Ubuntu folks are smoking.

Lame: You can map a network drive with their nice clicky tool! Yeah! Unless you use NFS. *blink* *blink* Huh? You're telling me you can map a drive with SSH or HTTP, but not NFS? Is this UNIX or kindergarten land?

Lamer still: Changing from DHCP to manual IP config doesn't fucking work. At all. Oh sure, it says it does. It lets you change the little boxes and then later when you come back it's changed them back to DHCP.

Plus points: It did recognize all the sound and network hardware, and the monitor.
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Fancy a witchetty grub? [Jan. 16th, 2009|10:16 am]
zuvembi
[mood |cheerfulcheerful]
[music |Leningrad - Zvevda Rok-N-Rolla]

Ah, Casu Marzu, one of my favorite horrifying foods to share (knowledge of) with other people. I heard about it a few years ago and have always taken it as another proof that people will eat anything that doesn't kill them (immediately). [1] Also, this coincidentally is one of the foods I never intend to try, even if I did happen to have goggles with me and a gutfull of hightest.



Boingboing has an article about it, evidently after William Gibson covered it in his blog. Thank Bog this is not a video entry.

[1]Related rule: All mushrooms are edible. Some, however, only once. - Ino in the Scary Devil Monastery
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They're always oppressing me [Nov. 17th, 2008|02:56 pm]
zuvembi
[Tags|, , , ]
[mood |bouncybouncy]

The bike shop called to tell me they managed to un-pretzel my frame. I actually had help breaking it for a change. I was walking past Lee behind him in the parking lot and he started walking backwards and tripped over my bike. He bent up my wheel badly. Enough so that I had to bang it against the curb to straighten it enough to ride.

I didn't realize till this morning, partway to work that it was the *frame* that was bent.

I turned around and went home at that point, called my boss and told her I would work from home Friday.

The truly sad part is we were all stone sober, just hanging around in the QFC waiting for people to finish up.

My rear triangle looked a bit like this:



That's why Ben (who was trying to help me fix it) kept muttering about my wheel dish being off. The frame is off, not the wheel. But we couldn't see it in the dark.

The thing that gave me a chuckle was what the bike shop said when they called to tell me my bike was done.

Mechanic: "You know the rear wheel is unsafe, the braking surface is totally concave."
Me: "No no no, I've got 1.8mm of rim left, that's at least 0.8mm more than minimum safety margin.[1]"

I did end up assuring her that I had decided to swap the rim regardless. Between Lee falling on it, the fact that it has had a lot of braking surface worn off and other things, it's probably time to change it. It doesn't hurt I have a spare rim to hand to do it with, so I don't even have to go buy anything.

[1] Yes, I actually have a caliper just for this.
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The Phillys? Are they a baseball team or something? [Oct. 21st, 2008|09:27 am]
zuvembi
[Tags|, , , , , ]

So I flew back East to Philadelphia for a super short trip to visit my older Brother [1]. It was his birthday and we spent the time wandering around on bicycles, shopping, picking up presents for him, provisions for a party Friday and generally hanging around.

Highlights:

  • Sam's Morning Glory - I'm pretty sure I had an extended foodgasm from the Monkey French Toast. [2]
  • Manayunk - To pick up this print as one of his birthday presents.
  • Daffy's - Excellent overstock store, think Nordstrom rack. I picked up a nice new Merino wool sweater for $30.
  • Chinatown - To pick up a birthday cake.
  • Ikea - Things for Macaire's apartment. Since the new building owners repainted, tiled and carpeted his place is looking pretty swank.
  • Picture hanging (FAIL) - I think his walls are made of paper-mâché. Sorry about the hole in your wall. :-(
  • Party - Rock Band 2 with the really nice drums [3]. Lots of people, lots of socializing, lots of video game playing.
  • Happily Ever After - A super nice toy store. Very friendly owners and some incredibly neat things.
  • Touscher Chocolates - Veeeery nice Swiss chocolates.


All in all a very successful visit.

[1] I landed Thursday morning and left Saturday afternoon.
[2] Challah French Toast with mango and banana's and caramel sauce.
[3] And a 108" projection screen, and $300 dollars of downloaded songs.
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Hot Bibliophile action [Oct. 9th, 2008|02:17 pm]
zuvembi
[Tags|, ]

A blog dedicated to nothing but books. TheBlogOnTheBookshelf doesn't get many comments, but it is updated fairly frequently.

A few of my favorites after the cut:Collapse )
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Contradications [Oct. 2nd, 2008|04:55 pm]
zuvembi
[Tags|, , ]
[mood |moderately manic]

I don't remember who said it, it might have been from some form of pop culture, it might have been a character in a book. But it was a short monologue about what weakens a man. Paraphrasing as best as I can remember it:

"The things that make a man weak are contradictions. They slow you up and make you waste your energy. They make you run around in circles and second-guess yourself constantly. Nothing is as strong as a man with no contradictions. Pure love, pure hate, pure anything can free you up and make your focus as sharp as a blade."

I haven't become imbued with any super powers lately, but I do feel a bit like my internal Gordian knot has become frayed. I'm sure it's all a momentary internal calm. But I'm enjoying it while it lasts.

Time to go ride bikes.
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Fun with Fruit [Sep. 10th, 2008|03:06 pm]
zuvembi
[Tags|, , , ]

Evidently in Valencia Spain, for a reason that no human can agree on, people throw about 100 tons of overripe tomatoes at one another. The Tomatina Festival lasts a week long with food, parades, paella, and the usual accoutrements.

It attracts huge numbers of tourists, swelling the towns population three to five times it's normal size.

The actual throwing of tomatoes lasts one hour and is signaled to start and end with a burst of water from cannons.




It sounds like good filthy fun.
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